Liz had the labour she always imagined - she
used several comfort measures and had wonderful support from her husband
and doula. She coped beautifully and felt strong and in control. But
after many hours with no progress, Liz and her husband Jimmy chose to
have a caesarean. They found their entire experience positive and
affirming.
We knew what we wanted in terms of a birth experience: a natural birth,
with no drugs and as few interventions as necessary, labouring at home
for as long as possible, then going into hospital for the final stages.
I had enjoyed a very easy and healthy pregnancy and looked forward to a
similar experience of birth.
Both of us had done lots of research and realised that it was our
responsibility to make our vision possible by being well-informed and
selecting sympathetic caregivers. We chose Dr. Tseng at Thomson Medical
Centre and employed a doula, Claire. When she asked us what our ideal
birth would be, we said we wanted it to be as natural as possible, in a
loving environment. But whatever happened, we wanted to be fully
informed so that we could be confident we were making the best decisions
in any given circumstance.
When the time came, we spent about twelve hours of active labour at
home. I concentrated on deep breathing, soaked in a warm bath and stayed
as mobile as possible. Having a relaxed atmosphere with music, scented
oils, massage and snacks at home definitely helped to keep me loose and
confident. I used a TENS
[transcutaneous electronic stimulation] machine, which I found
aided concentration and relaxation. It also acted as a silent signal to
my caregivers as I pressed a booster button every time a surge came.
After a show, my waters broke and we headed for the hospital. There we
found that the active birth room with the bath we had planned to use was
already occupied. The room we took instead was smaller, but we got mats
to kneel on, we had brought a ball, and there was a powerful hot shower.
Claire dimmed the lights, my husband set up the music and we were in a
cosy birth cocoon again. Nurses came in every so often to take
temperature and measure blood pressure. They monitored the surges and
the baby's heartbeat for 20 minutes when we arrived. Dr. Tseng checked
and I was 4cm dilated. All was well, but there was still a way to go.
I did a lot of walking around, kneeling, bending, circling my hips to
the music. The surges got stronger. My husband and I had a hot shower. I
ate my favourite snacks to keep up my strength, and Claire kept
reminding me to empty my bladder. I did not notice the hours ticking by.
Suddenly, I was in transition, at about 7pm. I was kneeling and I felt
cold and my legs were shaking uncontrollably.
Afterwards, I felt strangely calm and the surges melted away. This must
be the "rest and be thankful" phase we'd read about in Sheila
Kitzinger's book. I lay down and dozed for a while. It must be time to
push I thought, but the surges were not very strong and I did not feel
like pushing. Not wanting to force anything, I walked around and my
husband and I cuddled and kissed. Things picked up a little. I sat on
the birthing stool and pushed. And pushed. But it felt unnatural.
Later, Dr Tseng looked in again and said to relax – and just to push
when I got the urge. But no urge came and soon the nurse wanted to
monitor the baby again. They checked my dilation. 9cm. Not long to go
now, I thought. But before long I started to doubt myself. Everyone kept
encouraging me but deep inside, I knew that something wasn't quite
right.
At 3am, Dr Tseng came back and examined the monitoring readouts and me.
He looked serious. He told us that my cervix had stopped dilating at 9cm
and had started to swell. The baby's head was stuck so he released it
and moved it back up inside the womb. His view was that the safest thing
would be to operate quickly because the baby's heart rate was dropping
every so often and there were no more surges. He left us to talk about
it and decide what to do.
Even though we had wanted a natural birth without drugs, it was an easy
decision in the end to agree to the emergency Caesarean section. Both
the baby and I had experienced more than 24 hours of labour and lots of
lovely hormones, but now we were stuck. My husband and I had all the
information we needed to make the decision and it felt right.
Our caregivers had encouraged us to achieve our vision and given us the
chance to decide when things changed. A few minutes later, our beautiful
son was born, fit and healthy.
Things turned out slightly differently than we had expected, but the
trusting relationships we had built up with our caregivers meant that we
always felt that we were directing events and having the loving,
momentous experience we wanted, rather than being pushed in directions
we did not want to go. This was what we had hoped and planned for all
along, and we felt very fortunate that we were in an environment – and
with people - that allowed us to achieve that goal.
What's going on
here?
Liz writes in her story about how important it was
that she find a doctor and hospital who were in line with her own
desired approach to birth. How can you be sure you've got a good match
with your doctor? A ParentLink birth plan consultation can
help. A doula can meet with you and your partner to help you sort it all
out ... you end up with piece of mind and a valuable written birth plan
that's truly effective – not just another
piece of scrap paper!
Click here for details on birth plan
consultations.
What about the birth itself? Labour is unpredictable! There are no
guarantees when it comes to having a baby, but most parents feel as Liz
and Jimmy did: that the most important thing is that they felt in
control of their choices, and had plenty of time to consider their
options and decide what was right for them.
Liz and Jimmy appreciated their doula's assistance with comfort
techniques, her reassurance, and her skilled support when they had
difficult decisions to make. For them, that support helped them feel
their labour and birth – including the
caesarean they ultimately chose – was a
loving and cherished experience. If you'd like to learn more about how a
doula could help you and your partner,
click here for details.
To talk over your particular needs or concerns, you can:
call Tania at +65 9671-8428
oremail us
